Puffing up hill
There is a significant age range amongst the members of our cheery flock of trekkers. Give or take a year or two I think the ages range from 18 to 70.
But age does not appear to determine pace on this trip. However I think I have deduced the magic ingredient that determines the speed of ascent - or at least the lack of it! Let me explain by painting a few portraits.
I am not sure how old Geraldine is and am too polite to enquire. She has always appeared youthful but I think that might be deceptive. I remember, in 1994, when she signed up for BMEME I casually enquired about what grade of junior doctor she was. The indignant reply came back, 'I'm a Consultant' so even then looks were deceptive! On the trail though she accelerates effortlessly past like a greyhound and is soon lost in the twists and turns around the chortens and the mani stones.
Mark booked his retirement cruise on Shimshal in 2013 and was first in Nepal in 1969 working as a rural drug dealer for the British Nepal Medical Trust. That makes him fairly antique and, like Geraldine, well retired. On the trail he is a bit of an enigma. Sometimes he crosses the line well after the others but he dawdles more than most with an expensive and extensive range of optics he has to keep exercised. At other times he gets the bit between his teeth and his crimson trousers throw up the dust as he flashes past. Have no doubt he is more than capable of pole position.
Also on the 2013 retirement cruise was Denzil who is more whippit than greyhound. He is rarely seen on the trail as he is usually at the front somewhere. Maybe a mile or two ahead?
So the first three speed machines are all long retired and I am wondering if you have yet spotted the key ingredient for speed.
When Tim approaches from behind you hear him coming a mile off and he is definitely more labrador than greyhound as he bounds past. But bound past he does even though he is no longer wearing his beloved off-white overalls. For he too is retired but at a much more tender age. For the record though I am reliably informed that those same overalls are all neatly washed and pressed awaiting their next tour of duty on the good ship Shimshal!
Hot on Tim's heels comes Heather and her flailing ski sticks. Usually I step aside for Heather giving her plenty of room to pass but pass she does. She tends to stay in view a little longer than most as she's a compassionate soul. Anyway short strides and big boulders make for more entertaining overtakings. Perhaps more Jack Russell than greyhound. Heather too is retired but at an embarrassingly young age having made her fortune in molecular biology.
No, retirement is not the secret of speed for then we have Joel who hasn't even started to work yet and so can't have retired. He carries a big pack although I'm convinced it's fluffed up with down to make it look heavy. Again he is seldom seen on trail as he diverts off to take in other attractions and use up the surplus energy of youth.
Although Maddy is capable of being out there with the greyhounds she works two days a week and gets placed somewhere close to Sally in the marching crocodile but I think that's more out of deference to her aunt. She is happy to plod along at any pace and, like a spaniel, ever eager to share the latest trekking experience whether it's a yak lookalike or the plot of the novel she devoured during lunch.
It must be the family likeness but Sally's overtakings are a bit spaniel like too. A little stiff in the legs these days but perfectly in her own element in a high mountain valley. In another life she would have been mountain goatherd although her knees might have put an end to that career by now. She still has a career counting beans but mainly in the voluntary sector so, according to the emerging equation that puts her somewhere in the middle of the crocodile.
The 3 full time workers form very much the tail of the monster as it slithers it's way up the mountain. Sarah, Neil and me spend too much time pursuing gainful employment to get placed on the great Himalayan March. We are the huskies pulling hard to keep up with the others.
The inverse work/ speed rule starts to come apart but then exceptions are always required to prove the rule.
Andy is very busy in retirement and remains on the medical register despite joining it 50 years ago. He has unusual paid employment that requires annual appraisal but he struggles to get patient feedback to inform his revalidation. His job as a crematorium medical referee earns his place in the tale of the crocodile but we all know his guile, gizmos and cunning could put him much closer to the front. A little more 'Sherpa Oxygen' (which he keeps in a readily available pouch) and he would be bounding along like a retriever on a rescue.
Then there's Chris. Not retired but not working either I am not quite sure what status that affords her. My guess is Neil would say, 'kept woman' but I think 'lady of leisure' would be more appropriate. Definitely half lurcher she lurks at the back chatting up the guides and helping herself to frequent Fantas along the way. In her pack resides half a hospital of medical stores and she always arrives with stories along the way that will have eluded the front markers.
So the inverse work rule states that the harder you work the slower you go QED.
Not that any of that matters as we are a happy bunch of trekkers who always arrive and depart on time having enjoyed the day.